I’ve asked my dear darling hubby several times what he is getting me for Christmas and each time he has come back with ‘nothing.’ Now considering that the dear darling asshole is, as a rule, a very honest man I have to wonder about this. Is it a possibility that he wouldn’t or wouldn’t in this case? Yes. Oh something, usually quite nice may turn up a couple of days later just because he does like to be an ass. This is he is so dead pan about the whole thing that I believe that may well be the reality of the situation.
Why does he do this to me? For shits and giggles. I never met my husband father but I understand he was one to play pranks, sometimes bordering on down right mean, and my hubby is a lot like the man from everything I’ve heard, yes I can believe there is that chance. I have no doubt that at some point down the road there something will turn up down the road and I can assure you it will make me happy. Buddy does love to push my buttons on occasion. This might not be the year to pull one of his pranks.
I have to admit that when he pulls this something really special does turn up but like I said he is being way too deadpan this year. I mean there is no emotion to his responses at all. Usually there is that twinkle in his eye that smart ass grin, something. There is none this year. So either the man has gotten really good at hiding his emotions or he is telling the gospel truth.
He already has his from me. Maybe that’s what’s going on. He already has his so why should he bother? I know I sound like an ass but come on, give me a hint of something. Yes I have to admit I’m one of those who will drive you crazy with questions trying to find out what you got but come on.
Of course the real possibility is that he has gotten me something I really want, and need, and he is determined I don’t even begin to suspect that I might be getting it. Actually there are two thing but one I know isn’t on the table until after the first of the year. I’m OK with that, well almost OK, because it is a really big thing and it isn’t easy to get one. No I’m not telling what it is. The other item is also rather big and very special so he might be trying to really keeping me from guessing what it is. If it turns out to be that he has already lost that battle. We have spent a long time looking for the right one and as it turns out what I want is something that is going to have to be specially built for my needs. No I’m not saying what that is either.
All I know is that the damn thig had better be under the tree come Christmas morning. If not I will not be responsible for my actions. Yes I’m a spoiled brat but he has no one to blame for that but himself. He does spoil me. Hell he has bought so many things for me leading up to Christmas for me that me thinking I deserve anything else shows that. OK he’s a good guy but still, that is not under the tree. Actually if he wrapped a rock and put that under the tree I would find that so funny he could probably get away with that. Don’t tell him that. I really will get a wrapped rock under the tree, and I’m not talking about a diamond. Yes I’ve gotten those too. I told you I was spoiled. No that isn’t what I want this year.
I’m also practical. I’ve wanted a drone for a while now but I haven’t gotten one. You want to know why? I’m going to tell you anyway. Because I want an inexpensive one to start off with because I want to get used to the thing and get comfortable with it before we drop a lot of money into one because knowing me I’ll get the damn thing hung up in a free or power line. I lose a hundred bucks that’s one thing but something that cost over a thousand, and I’m talking well over which is what Buddy went to looking at, I really would be pissed. Maybe that’s what he has gotten me is an inexpensive drone. I’m good with that. I may be spoiled but I’m not mercenary.
Oh my husband isn’t the only one who has gotten deadpan. One of our daughters has been asking questions about hers. She asked me last night if it was bigger than a breadbox. I told her it was bigger than the head of a pin. She will not get me to give anything away this year. She is her mother’s daughter. Little stinker.
There will be an update after Christmas, either on my website on in the local news.
She was definitely a few pieces shy of a complete Erector Set.
"Nice equipment." said Alison.
"Don't I know it."
Would someone please make him stop excreting humanly body fluids?