Here I am sitting here waiting to see if all the kinks have been worked out on my new book. I've waited for the results of biopsies with less apprehension than I am for this. Come on people are you trying to give me a frigging heart attach.
Just checked again and still pending. Of course I only checked five minutes ago.
I swear it's like giving birth to a two hundred pound baby. I couldn't give birth to a 5 lb. 6 oz. baby girl naturally and they want me to deliver a cow. Come on people, knock me out and let me do this the way God intended. I think they should do for this what they used to do when a woman did give birth. Knock her out until the whole thing was over and you woke up and they handed you a baby. There was something so natural about that. You woke up they handed you the kid, you made sure it had all the necessary parts, counted it's fingers and toes and checked to make sure they got the sex right. Hey I wanted to be sure that the thing they handed me really was a girl. Can you imagine the shock I would have suffered if after telling me it was a female pulling aside that little diaper and finding an extra appendage you weren't expecting. I'd still be in counseling and Gian would have grown up with a lot more issues because of me than she has right now.
Actually except for having some horrible memories of a crazy mother she turned out pretty good. Fairly well adjusted, intelligent, and talented. I'm rather proud of her inspite of the fact that she thinks I'm nuts. Hell maybe because she does thinks I'm nuts. I told you she was intelligent.