This isn’t happening. Please tell me this isn’t happening. Oh God it is happening and my life started flashing through my mind. I wasn’t going to be given any comfort in this quick replay of my life because everything that swirled past in my head were the things that happened in one room. The one room where you should be able to lock a door and feel safe but for me that had often not been the case. The bathroom or in public the room labeled the ladies room.
From an early age anything bad that happened to me it most often happened in a bathroom or restroom somewhere.
I don’t know about before the time I was about five but my recallable memories of the horrors of that room started when I reached for the toilet paper and a huge spider landed on my hand and resulted in a scream from me that almost gave my mother a heart attack. That resulted in me getting a scolding from her that I felt I didn’t deserve. It also resulted in years of tormenting from my two brothers and sister that lasted into my adult years.
From rubber snakes tossed in my bathwater or shower if I left the bathroom after I started the water to them pounding on the door like madden monsters breaking in the door to get to me. This would be accompanied with menacing growls, shrieks of bone chilling intensity, and the most demonic laughter that would have made a sound producer’s mouth water at the thought of being able to produce such sound effects. My siblings had talent.
At seventeen while taking care of business the bathroom window was suddenly pushed open and some guy with wild hair stuck his head in the window. Of course I screamed. I don’t know if it was the surprise of seeing a young girl sitting on the toilet or my scream that made him rethink his actions but he left in a hurry. When the police arrived to take a report, boy was that one embarrassing, we found out that a business a few blocks over had been robbed and they felt sure the would-be intruder was probably one and the same and was looking for a place to hide. That certainly didn’t help my sense of security any and the crooked grins on their faces only added to my embarrassment.
Once while in a single person ladies room the door I was sure I had locked failed to stop some guy rushing in. Of course again I screamed and I think that scream came out in words to the effect of couldn’t you read the sign on the damn door ‘ladies room?’ The guy’s face took on a look of mortification and nearly broke his neck exiting the facilities. I might add he never did turn around however. Make what you will of that.
It goes without saying I’m sure that by this point I dreaded having to enter that one room anywhere. Oh I did. How could I not. I’m human and I have to do what all humans do. I also like to be clean so there you have it. This wasn’t a room I could avoid although I made a point of steering clear of public restrooms whenever possible.
The one time I ran from a bathroom was while I was at home and sitting on that porcelain throne a rodent managed to swim up the plumbing pipe and I suddenly had something poking me in the cheeks of my behind. I had to look. With my drawers dropped down to my ankles I made a quick exit from the room. Of course my new boyfriend was there at the time. What you thought that it would end with me just running from the room? Get real. I’m telling you when it comes to that one room whatever the worst things is that can happen to me it’s going to happen.
As those memories and others passed through my head I realize my worst fear was coming true. I would be eventually found lying on the remains of my bathroom floor with my undies around my knees or ankles with a look of fear, horror, and mortification so permanently plastered to my face the mortician would never be able to do anything to change it. You see my toilet was shaking. Not just a little bit either. Things were falling off the wall and shelves and even a little porcelain figurine had managed to be dislocated and hit me squarely on the head. How’s that for ironic? I was sitting on the toilet when an earthquake hits. I mean this is a big one. As a crack appears in the ceiling and I am nearly rocked off the toilet seat I do the only thing I know to do. I grab hold of the edge of the damn thing and pray they never find my body.